Happy! :)

To share the news with Nicole, we gave her a "back-to-school" gift to open.  Back in January, I bought a plain shirt for Nicole and painted it (see below).

Obviously I was hoping to be able to give it to her sooner than August, but I won't complain -- at least I got the opportunity to give it to her at all!  It just had to sit in my closet for 7 months!

For seven years, Ryan and I have been trying to get pregnant again.  During the times when I had insurance, doctors could never figure out why I wasn't getting pregnant.  During the times when I didn't have insurance, we just hoped and prayed that things would work out.  It's been very difficult, learning to accept God's will and God's timing.  It seems like every month I would find reasons why I thought "This has to be the month that we get pregnant!  It would just be perfect!!!".....and then we would find out that we weren't...again...  I watched and waited as so many other women around me got pregnant and had babies, and I was happy for them, but my heart ached because I just KNEW that I was meant to have more children.  I've learned how a heart can break in so many different ways, even after you think there's nothing left to be broken.  I've learned how to turn to my Savior and let Him heal my broken heart, time after time.  I've learned that God knows what He's doing, and I need to trust Him.  And this time, I'm seeing so many different ways that this is the perfect time for us!  I feel so happy, I could burst!

I am soooo grateful to receive the blessing of being pregnant again!  And I'm even more grateful because I know it's on the Lord's time, not my own.  My heart still aches for those women who aren't able to have the children they desire to have.  It's confusing and frustrating to have righteous desires seemingly denied...  But God knows what He's doing!

So, Nicole has prayed daily for years that Heavenly Father would bless her with a little brother or sister.  My heart broke for her each month when I would find out that her prayers weren't being answered in the way she'd hoped they would be.  But, now that the timing is right, we couldn't wait to tell her!!! :) :) :)  She opened the shirt, and at first she didn't quite understand what the it meant.  She read it, but Ryan had to ask her, "Are you a big sister?  Well, you will be soon!"  Then there was a lot of screaming and jumping up and down and laughing and clapping and joyous celebrating. :)

 If you can't tell by the look on her face in the picture above, she is intensely happy about this! ;)

All right.  I am now 5 weeks and 1 day along in this pregnancy.  Estimated due date is April 19th (my oldest brother's birthday).  I know it's really early to start sharing the news, but after waiting seven years for this, we just couldn't wait any longer to tell people!  :)  Please pray for a complication-free pregnancy for us!!!

Love you all!!!

~Jenni